Virtual Penis
2007-06-09 by xpheas
This funky Shell-Script calculates the penis length of your computer.
Usage:
Save as vpenis.sh and make it executable (> chmod a+x vpenis.sh)
> ./vpenis.sh
Have fun!
PS: My computers length: 86.2cm *gg*
UPDATE
Thanks to black07 for the bug report!
There was a problem with the code-highlight function, which is fixed now.
BASH-Code:
| #!/bin/sh LC_ALL=C echo `uptime|grep days|sed 's/.*up \([0-9]*\) day.*/\1\/10+/'; \ cat /proc/cpuinfo|grep MHz|awk '{print $4"/30 +";}'; free|grep '^Mem' \ |awk '{print $3"/1024/3+"}'; df -P -k -x nfs | grep -v 1k \ | awk '{if ($1 ~ "/dev/(scsi|sd)"){ s+= $2} s+= $2;} END \ {print s/1024/50"/15+70";}'`|bc|sed 's/\(.$\)/.\1cm/' |
Usage:
Save as vpenis.sh and make it executable (> chmod a+x vpenis.sh)
> ./vpenis.sh
Have fun!
PS: My computers length: 86.2cm *gg*
UPDATE
Thanks to black07 for the bug report!
There was a problem with the code-highlight function, which is fixed now.
« back
awk: {if ( ~ "/dev/(scsi|sd)"){ s+= } s+= ;} END {print s/1024/50"/15+70";}
awk: ^ syntax error
awk: {if ( ~ "/dev/(scsi|sd)"){ s+= } s+= ;} END {print s/1024/50"/15+70";}
awk: ^ syntax error
awk: {if ( ~ "/dev/(scsi|sd)"){ s+= } s+= ;} END {print s/1024/50"/15+70";}
awk: ^ syntax error
(standard_in) 1: parse error
(standard_in) 2: parse error
That would be like... 42 meters...
The answer to life!
Ok, lets call that a bug. I had BC_ENV_ARGS set to "-l"
Which causes it to display more decimals, and your "divide by ten by adding a decimal-dot before the last number" doesn't work :P
So, getting it right, it is
425.7cm
+ 10cm for finding a bug *scnr*